Quote of the Day

"Shortly after the [Minneapolis Internal Affairs Report] was issued, a battalion of MFD firefighters was deployed to MPD HQ to extinguish Chief Dolan's pants."

-Joel Rosenberg

War on Work

Found via Chris. Go buy a cookbook.

Crystal Skull Vodka

A few weeks ago, I ordered a bottle of Crystal Head Vodka from Wally's Wines.

The bottle scores a 10 of 10 for coolness.

The vodka scores a mere 9 of 10, if you were to be rating the taste of rubbing alcohol, as opposed to the taste of supposedly high-end vodka. Yuck. A strong foretaste of isopropyl followed by grimaces, groans, and vodka snobs laughing at me as they wait their turn to make the same faces.

Buy it for the bottle and don't ever open it.

Or open it, dump it out and fill it with Ketel One. An informal side-by-side comparison rates the KO much higher than Akroyd's personal brand.

Memorial Day

JUST A COMMON SOLDIER

(A Soldier Died Today)

by A. Lawrence Vaincourt

He was getting old and paunchy and his hair was falling fast,

And he sat around the Legion, telling stories of the past.

Of a war that he had fought in and the deeds that he had done,

In his exploits with his buddies; they were heroes, every one.

And tho' sometimes, to his neighbors, his tales became a joke,

All his Legion buddies listened, for they knew whereof he spoke.

But we'll hear his tales no longer for old Bill has passed away,

And the world's a little poorer, for a soldier died today.

He will not be mourned by many, just his children and his wife,

For he lived an ordinary and quite uneventful life.

Held a job and raised a family, quietly going his own way,

And the world won't note his passing, though a soldier died today.

When politicians leave this earth, their bodies lie in state,

While thousands note their passing and proclaim that they were great.

Papers tell their whole life stories, from the time that they were young,

But the passing of a soldier goes unnoticed and unsung.

Is the greatest contribution to the welfare of our land

A guy who breaks his promises and cons his fellow man?

Or the ordinary fellow who, in times of war and strife,

Goes off to serve his Country and offers up his life?

A politician's stipend and the style in which he lives

Are sometimes disproportionate to the service that he gives.

While the ordinary soldier, who offered up his all,

Is paid off with a medal and perhaps, a pension small.

It's so easy to forget them for it was so long ago,

That the old Bills of our Country went to battle, but we know

It was not the politicians, with their compromise and ploys,

Who won for us the freedom that our Country now enjoys.

Should you find yourself in danger, with your enemies at hand,

Would you want a politician with his ever-shifting stand?

Or would you prefer a soldier, who has sworn to defend

His home, his kin and Country and would fight until the end?

He was just a common soldier and his ranks are growing thin,

But his presence should remind us we may need his like again.

For when countries are in conflict, then we find the soldier's part

Is to clean up all the troubles that the politicians start.

If we cannot do him honor while he's here to hear the praise,

Then at least let's give him homage at the ending of his days.

Perhaps just a simple headline in a paper that would say,

Our Country is in mourning, for a soldier died today.

Local Activism

First, the socialist ninnies:

The Welfare Rights Committee started in 1992. We are group of low-income people fighting so poor families can survive, not just for now, but for the future.

You do NOT have a right to my life, or my work. If you don't like your station in life, go to school, get a better job, do something! Don't try to take what I have worked for.

Next, the pro-terrorist pacifists, presented without comment:

In the fall of 1981, ten women began to meet in Loretta’s Tea Room in Minneapolis to figure out how to most effectively respond to the threat of nuclear war....

Z is for Zombie

Found on My First Dictionary.

A Lesson

Sunday, my son went to visit a friend. His bike went with. When I picked him up, the bike got wedged in to the cargo area of my car, hanging over the back seat, tangled in the boxes of stuff that live in my car.

Monday, my wife reminded me to take the bike out of the car. I told her I wanted some help to guide the bike up and over all of the obstacles and snags, without breaking, tearing or beating anything in the car. It would be easier that way. We forgot.

Tuesday, while getting ready in the morning, my son told his little sister that he was going to ride his bike to daycare. I informed him that he couldn't, as his bike was still in my car and we were running late.

He informed me that he took it out of the car, by himself, the previous evening, without breaking, ripping, or beating anything in the car.

There's my lesson in humility.

Nanny State Nonsense

Not only is driving without a seat belt becoming a primary offense(we can get pulled over for not wearing a seat belt, now), but adults are now forced to wear seat belts in the rear seat.

Can't let an adult make an adult decision, can we?

Magical Thinking in Government

How does an executive decree create a technological breakthrough?

Cultist Idiocy

...students, staff and community members at Webster Magnet Elementary voted earlier this month to change the school's name to "Barack and Michelle Obama Service Learning Elementary."

What, exactly, has he done to deserve any form of memorial, so far? He campaigned on "I'm not Bush" and has run his office with a policy of "Just like the last guy, only moreso".

If my kids were in that district, they would be open-enrolled into another school. Not just because of the name, but because of the "service learning" nonsense.

Service-learning is an exciting, hands-on approach to education taking place in a wide variety of settings: in schools and universities, and in community-based and faith-based organizations throughout the country. The core concept driving this educational strategy is that by combining service objectives and learning objectives, along with the intent to show measurable change in both the recipient and the provider of the service, the result is a radically-effective transformative method of teaching students.

Translation: We don't know how to teach, so we're going to skip that, and tell your kids that their entire worth is decided by how much they do for others. No accomplishments necessary, just do whatever makes you feel good about yourself.