Thursday, January 31, 2008

Jesse the Wonderpoodle, Chapter 10

Three days before leaving for Colorado I hit a deer with my truck doing $1800 dollars in damage.

This year I got a couple of friends to go to Colorado with us. Dennis thought I was pulling his leg when I told him that I averaged ten miles a day. But he soon found I wasn’t, he averaged eight miles a day and on the last day (the day we packed up and left) he walked seventeen miles before we loaded the truck for our nonstop trip home (1200 miles).

Luckily we got to cross Nebraska in the dark.

Because of the drought most of the elk had moved down to the farmers fields looking for food making the hunt iffy at best. The day before opening I showed Dennis and Darin a couple of places to hunt (being that we got out there so late they had to rely on my advice). Darin sat down the fork of the stream were I seen the seven mulies the year before. Dennis was in a meadow just over the ridge were a herd of elk had been seen feeding a few days earlier. Their dad (Joel) was in the meadow behind camp (don’t think this is a bad spot because in years past we’ve taken several elk and mulies off this meadow).

I had bought a new pair of boots just a couple of weeks before leaving and they still weren’t broke in. Like every year I climbed the mountain across the stream where I would stay until about an hour after sun up. Then I’d slowly start working the ridges (if there was any elk up there I’d either hear them running off or see them and if the wind was right I’d be able to smell them) trying to get the elk moving. After a couple of hours my feet were killing me (I vowed to never again buy that brand of boot).

While stalking I ran into another hunter who was heading out for lunch. It had been a miserable day for hunting (I don’t think the temp. dropped below 80 degrees while the sun was up). The only thing he had seen was a 4x4 mulie (count the points per-side, /while the animal is facing you left to right)and that was it (it was better than what I had seen). I left him after hearing his story and with the lack of gun shots I could tell that every body else was having just as much luck. YEE Ha I’ve got a day to play with and off to the gulch I headed which turned out to be both my nightmare and obsession.

That night, just before sundown I heard a shot. When I got back to camp it was well after dark (I had six miles to go when I heard the shot). It had been Dennis who shot and believed he got it but didn’t want to try tracking it in the dark. I said that I’d help track it at noon the next day (that would give me the morning to slowly make my way there). The next day I was up on the ridge making my way down to a meadow on the north side when I heard a noise and slowly went to check it out (there was no quietly with all the dry pin needles). As I got closer to where the sound had come from I heard another noise (like quick moving feet). I slowed my movement down even more, to the point were I was giving myself cramps trying to not make any noise. The next thing I know there’s a noise to my right, I looked over and seen an elk running across a clear-cut (old logging site) and it’s a bull, and it’s legal (the first legal bull elk I’ve seen during season). Buck fever set in, I calmed myself and pulled up (I was 30 yards in the trees, so window’s of opportunity were limited) put the cross hairs on his shoulder and touched one off. The elk spun around trying to find where the shot had come from. In my excitement I only pulled the bolt up half way while trying to eject the spent round making a very frustrating few moments. I got a new round in the chamber and pulled up to take aim but the elk had moved to a spot were I had a pine tree blocking my view. I dropped to my knee to get under the branches only to have the roll of the hillside make the elk disappear. I quickly got to my feet and started running for the tree line, throwing my shoulder into a small pine to stop my momentum, pulled up, put the cross hairs on its shoulder one more time and touched it off. The elk started running, I bolted in another round and again with the cross hairs on its shoulder touched it off (to give you an idea on my frustration, with this gun I can put three shots into the size of my thumb nail at a 100 yards and now to miss three times at 75 yards). I bolted in my last shot and took aim, I touched it off just as he was entering the tree line on the other side and was gone.

While looking for blood my uncle showed up (the reason the elk came around that side is because my uncle was coming up the draw. So when I pushed him out he ran into my uncle and came back around) and we spent close to half an hour looking for blood. Hell we’d been happy to find a track in the hard ground. We didn’t so I headed off to meet up with Dennis to help track. While crossing over a mountain (hill) I saw movement out of the corner of my eye, stopped and pulled my gun up. I looked at it through the scope but because of the brush behind it I wasn’t able to make out its antlers. So I lowered my gun saying “its just a damn cow (female elk)” then it started running with the sun glisting off its antlers. I sent a whole herd of profanity chasing him off the hill, I may not have got to shoot him but I’m pretty sure I hurt his feelings. A short time later I arrived at the meadow were Dennis was supposed to be (Dennis had got his elk, it had gone just past the tree line before dieing). I waited there for about half an hour before heading out.

The next couple of days were very uneventful. A couple of us decided to walk from the road in and push the gulch. It turned out to be the most god-awful three miles of the area. First, I was walking on broken slag along a steep slop holding onto sage brush and praying that their roots would hold until I could grab the next one. Then the terrain changed to jagged rock with treacherous footing before turning into a plato with no trees to block the sun (I drank two canteens of water before I got to the top of the gulch). When I got to the gulch I found a spot and started climbing, I was almost to the top when I ran into another hunter who told me that the only thing he’d seen was a couple of mulies. I turned around and went back to the bottom, once there I fired a shot into a stump to get any animals in the area moving.

I walked along the bottom for a ways until I found a spot that looked climbable and headed up once again. Shortly after starting up I heard what sounded like a war up on top the ridge. By the time I got to the top all the shooting was done and Joel had got his first elk (like father, like son they both shot there elk in the hind quarters making them members of the not so popular club of “ASS SHOOTERS”). All the rest of the shooting was because a bull had ran across and just about every body opened up on it (fifteen shots) and only wounded it. When I got to where everybody was they pointed to where the bull had entered the trees. The Sawyer boys, Dustin and myself went to go track it. The wound was so slight that the elk had walked into the woods about twenty yards, licked the wound clean and headed for the high mountain.

I was told later when they came out that one of the hunters from our camp was in the woods relieving himself (taken a crap) when Dave yelled to him saying “if you want to get some shooting in you’d better get out here”. The guy came waddling out, his rifle in one hand and his pants in the other. Took two shots and quickly waddled back into the trees.

The last day of the season Mike shot a beauty of a 6x6 elk. While we were getting it deboned we were trying to decide if we wanted to walk back the five and a half miles to camp along the stream or go two miles to the road down a vary steep mountain side. By unanimous vote we choose the slope. Every body had blisters of one degree or another and walking down this slope with about an extra sixty pounds of meat on our backs (per person). Every step made your feet slide forward in your boots ripping open the blisters and my knee was really starting to act up (two days before I had stepped on a branch that catapulted up into my knee, it wasn’t the hurt right away deal. NO! it didn’t start hurting until I stopped moving giving it time to swell). By the time we got to the road no one was lifting their legs to walk.

After we got back to Minnesota we had a couple of weeks before rifle season started. Being that I wasn’t rifle hunting this year I volunteered to skin deer at the locker. This gave me something to do and a little spending cash.

On one morning after skinning I got up to do chores and had this incredible pain in my side. At first I though it was a pulled muscle or that I had ran my ribs into something that seemed minor at the time. It wasn’t until later that day when I took my shirt off to take a shower that dad noticed the bruise on my side and asked “what the hell did you do to your side”. I looked down at it (I hadn’t figured it was worth the time to check out). And noticed what looked like hairs sticking out of what looked like a puncher wound and my only thought was “how’d I get deer hair in there”, as I looked closer I noticed that what look like hairs were attached to a body. I had to use both hands to pull the tick off.

Once the tick was off we were able to get a good look at it. It was a deer tick and the dimes size bulls eye bruise around the bitten area was the tell tale sign for lime disease. I grabbed my shirt and quickly drove into the clinic to get it checked out (now don’t start thinken that I run into the hospital every time I get a boo boo. But this lime disease is one thing you don’t want. Once the damage is done its permanent–it attacks your joints and lower back. Being that I didn’t have insurance the nurse’s didn’t do the test (witch is only 30% accurate). They just gave the cure. I had to take enough antibiotics to kill a horse for two weeks and I still have a little red scar were it had bite me.

I Want!


Linky

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Netflix

So, Netflix removed the link to "Movies releasing this week."

I found the link.

No need to thank me, me. It's all part of the service I provide to myself.

The Primaries and Candidates, in a Nutshell

P.J. O'Rourke explains our primary system and the current crop of candidates.

Hillary Clinton is "America's ex-wife." A man can be a Democrat to the core, going into the voting booth to pull the lever with the donkey label no matter what. Then he sees Hillary's name on the ballot. And it all comes back to him .  .  . the first marriage .  .  . the time he came home a little late, it wasn't even midnight, and he'd only had four or five beers, and she threw his bowling ball down the storm sewer.



Via Cold Fury

You Decide 2008


I can't decide who to vote against next week. On either side of the aisle.

I think it would be wonderful to have a debate with ALL of the front-runners from both major parties. We could get all of them on the same stage, discussing the issues and their pseudo-opinions and quasi-positions.

Then, when they are all red-faced and screaming, a meteor could hit, obliterating them all. That much evil and otherwise not-good in one room....god would have to wipe them out, wouldn't he? If I were an all-powerful imaginary friend, I would.

Deep-fried, cheese-stuffed, 100% bacon burger


No beef included.

Jesse the Wonderpoodle, Chapter 9

I haven't posted any of the chapters in a while, so here is the next installment.

Previous chapters available here.

In September my sister got married in Sedona Arizona. It was a real treat. We seen the grand canyon along with some of the other sites. Jeremiah (my youngest brother) and myself rented a convertible for the week. While at the grand canyon Jason and Elizabeth (my brother and his wife) arrived (they drove) and had the motorcycle in the back. Being it was a nice day they decided to ride the bike. While mom got it into her head that we were going to be late and took off, Jerry in Elizabeth’s truck, I’m in the convertible (Elizabeth would rather be skun alive before letting me drive her new truck) and Jason and Elizabeth on the bike. As soon as mom hit some open road she put the hammer down and was gone Jerry and myself were hard into the throttle to keep up. Jason was five cars back at the start so we didn’t put much concern on them thinking they would catch up, if not we figured they had a cell phone or if all else failed making the assumption that they knew where to go. Well they didn’t, they didn’t even have a cell phone with them.

If you’ve been down some of those mountain roads during the day light you know how treacherous they can be. Now try it in the dark on a motor cycle when the driver has a heavy foot. We lost contact for almost 24 hours. We didn’t get much sleep that night, having to listen to mom rant and rave to keep her self from going into hysterics. The only saving grace was that for part of the pre-wedding activities was going on a tour of the Sedona area and had set a meeting spot that Elizabeth found after a couple of phone calls (they had gotten stuck behind some Sunday drivers and were not able to get around due to traffic). It was nice but had no leg room. My personal opinion is that they are not a practical vehicle (at least not for me). While riding around in it I sunburned my forehead, you can’t even put on a hat to keep the sun off because the brow ridge is rubbing against it and holding the sweat salt there. But any way back to the wedding.

The ceremony was in the shadow of cathedral rock along the river bank. The wedding party and any who wanted to make the journey had a four mile hike through the desert to the site of the ceremony (the grandparents and photographer only had a half mile hike from the other side). The musician they hired played three different kinds of native American flutes, the music they produced combined with the locusts crying in the back ground was a magical sound. Terra (my sister) was dressed in an Indian sari (India Indian) it was the same dress my mom made and wore on her wedding day. On the hike out I made pretty good time, but Andrew’s (Terra’s husband) dad who is in his seventies passed me up and made it to the end of the trail almost fifteen minutes before I did, talk about impressive. As some of you may know I was not the happiest camper at how Andrew and Terra met. But they’ve been together for almost five years with very few known problems not to mention rubbing me the wrong way (joke) when they went to Europe before I got the chance to.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

They're both right

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. (AP) - Mitt Romney and John McCain accused each other Monday of being liberals, a charge tantamount to blasphemy in the caustic campaign for the Republican presidential nomination.



Link

State of the Union

Apparently, Bush has hired an actual economist.

Just as we trust Americans with their own money, we need to earn their trust by spending their tax dollars wisely. Next week, I'll send you a budget that terminates or substantially reduces 151 wasteful or bloated programs, totaling more than $18 billion. The budget that I will submit will keep America on track for a surplus in 2012. American families have to balance their budgets; so should their government.

The people's trust in their government is undermined by congressional earmarks -- special interest projects that are often snuck in at the last minute, without discussion or debate. Last year, I asked you to voluntarily cut the number and cost of earmarks in half. I also asked you to stop slipping earmarks into committee reports that never even come to a vote. Unfortunately, neither goal was met. So this time, if you send me an appropriations bill that does not cut the number and cost of earmarks in half, I'll send it back to you with my veto. (Applause.)

And tomorrow, I will issue an executive order that directs federal agencies to ignore any future earmark that is not voted on by Congress. If these items are truly worth funding, Congress should debate them in the open and hold a public vote. (Applause.)

Abso-freakin-lutely. This bit here makes the entire speech good. Reign in Congress and let me keep my money.

My favorite quote from the speech:
The best way to achieve that goal is by expanding consumer choice, not government control.

I won't include the context for "that goal", because it is a valid statement, no matter what.


On the other hand, his education and immigration experts are still 'special'. Not short-bus special, they are all the way into hockey-helmet special.
Six years ago, we came together to pass the No Child Left Behind Act, and today no one can deny its results.

That's not exactly true. When the tests get recalibrated to make kids pass, it kind of defeats the purpose.

So we're expanding funding for this type of ethical medical research. And as we explore promising avenues of research, we must also ensure that all life is treated with the dignity it deserves. And so I call on Congress to pass legislation that bans unethical practices such as the buying, selling, patenting, or cloning of human life. (Applause.)

Talk about half a story. Selling the goo that was part of a human at some point, or cloning organs isn't necessarily unethical.

Yet we also need to acknowledge that we will never fully secure our border until we create a lawful way for foreign workers to come here and support our economy.
We have this. It's done through Immigration. There's a legal path, and even a temporary worker program already. Don't offer amnesty. Any new law offering amnesty will get the current Congress thrown out on it's ass.

News Flash

TSA Security Theater doesn't work.
The Joneboro Thug may be on his way back to jail. It's a shame that he was tried as a juvenile and allowed to breathe free air in his lifetime. He was a murdering POS, he is a murdering POS, and he always will be a murdering POS.

Johnson lived in North Carolina and California for a while. He even returned to Jonesboro over Christmas 2006, where Craighead County Sheriff Jack McCann had warned that deputies "couldn't guarantee" the safety of either him or Golden.

It's a shame they were as efficient as the appear to be. A little "accident" couldn't hurt...much.

Via Tam

Fred Thompson

Kevin got an interesting letter from the Thompson campaign.

Disorganized, indeed.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Man Down

Requiescat In Pace
January 27, 2008 -- The Department of Defense announced today the death of a soldier who was supporting Operation Enduring Freedom.

Sgt. 1st Class Matthew Ryan Kahler, 29, of Granite Falls, Minnesota, died Jan. 26 in FOB Fenty, Afghanistan, of injuries sustained from small arms fire in Waygul, Afghanistan.

Miss America




By The Military Motivator

Quote of the Day

"Evil is not defeated by submitting to it. Evil is not defeated by running away from it; nor is evil defeated by ignoring it.

Evil is only defeated by fighting back."
-LawDog

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Glasses

Followup to this post.

I did a bunch of research, price comparisons, and droning-on regarding online eyeglass purchases. I spent some time here, reading reviews.

Goggles 4U has had some recent problems, but they also had the style I wanted, in frames that fit my face, for a price I was willing to pay. So, I'm gambling that they have fixed their recent issues, and if they haven't, they do still have a 100% satisfaction guarantee.

Overheard tonight

Dumbass: I'm already having a midlife crisis, and I'm in my twenties. I hate my job, I don't like my home, I'm not happy with my relationships or my surroundings....
Me: That's not a midlife crisis, that's adulthood.

Waste of skin

How stupid do you have to be...
Later, authorities said, officers went to a home in Princeton owned by an acquaintance of the suspect and arrested him after he apparently cut his own wrists and tried to set fire to himself and the home.

The suspect was in police custody at a hospital, the Sheriff's Office said.

...to NOT die after slashing your wrists and setting yourself on fire?


Linky

Friday, January 25, 2008

The Election Question

Given a generally Republican affiliation, in a four way race between Hillary - D, McCain - R, Bloomberg - I, and Ron Paul - I, who would you pick?

From arkythehun

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Drama

Coach: Dad said 'I'm going to shoot you' during Little League game

The coach who said he was threatened by a parent of one of his Little League players testified today that Wade Campbell was "screaming" at him during the June 22 game on St. Paul's east side.

"I know where you live," Noe Ambriz quoted Campbell as saying. " 'I'm going to shoot you, boy,' were the words that were coming out of his mouth when he was approaching me. I was scared by this time."

Ambriz, who coached the team of 11- and 12-year-olds with his wife's help, got even more frightened when a police officer told him two days later that he would be wise to take precautions to protect his family, he said.

"To hear those words coming from an officer - you can imagine how I felt," he testified.

Campbell, 47, is on trial in Ramsey County District Court on a charge of making terroristic threats to Ambriz.

The testimony continues this afternoon.


If you are so wrapped up in your kid's athletics that death threats seem reasonable, you shouldn't have been breeding. Get an adult hobby. Geez, hire a hooker or something.

Progress at gunpoint

...property owners learned that the Duluth School District plans to acquire their land and homes to complete its long-term facilities plan.

Yippee! More government theft in the name of 'progress'.

The district will hire two independent appraisers to evaluate each property and, following the appraisal, will present each property owner with a written offer based on the property’s appraised value, Hoff said. If a property owner wants another appraisal, the district will pay $1,500 toward the third appraisal.

If the property owner is satisfied with the offer, the district will pay for closing costs, deal with any mortgage companies, and pay for relocation costs and moving costs where applicable, Hoff said. She was unable to give any range of compensation because each situation is different, she said.

If the district and the homeowner can’t reach an agreement, the district can acquire the property through eminent domain. A panel of three “qualified and impartial” residents will determine a fair price for the property. If the property owner doesn’t agree with that price, the decision can be appealed to a district court for a jury trial.


Tranlation: "Give us your property for the price we name, or we'll lower the price and force you to rack up a lot of legal bills to try to keep your property. We own the big guns, and we make the decisions, so you will lose, anyway."

Gee, isn't freedom grand?

Linky

Returning my property

Congressional leaders announced a deal with the White House Thursday on an economic stimulus package that would give most tax filers refunds of $600 to $1,200, and more if they have children


It sure is nice of the feds to give me back what was forcibly taken from me. How 'stimulating'. Can I go on a bank-robbing spree for a year, then return 10% of the take, and expect everyone to thank me?



Linky

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Welcome to the Future, Again

This is more like it.

The design of the Virgin Galactic tourist spacecraft was shown for the first time in New York City on Wednesday, with the actual spaceship under construction and about 60 percent complete.

I can't wait for the costs to come down.
More than 200 people have reportedly already put down deposits for the flights, which cost 100,000 pounds or $195,000.

That's for a 2 hour flight.

Gun Safety

Important lesson: Keep your fingers away from the cylinder gap on a revolver.



Hot gases escape from the gap between the cylinder and the barrel quickly. I've gotten burned by those gases.


























Here is the proper grip:

The Electoral College

Explaining the benefits of the electoral system for the innumerate(me).

The more Natapoff looked into the nitty-gritty of real elections, the more parallels he found with another American institution that stirs up wild passions in the populace. The same logic that governs our electoral system, he saw, also applies to many sports--which Americans do, intuitively, understand. In baseball’s World Series, for example, the team that scores the most runs overall is like a candidate who gets the most votes. But to become champion, that team must win the most games. In 1960, during a World Series as nail-bitingly close as that year’s presidential battle between Kennedy and Nixon, the New York Yankees, with the awesome slugging combination of Mickey Mantle, Roger Maris, and Bill "Moose" Skowron, scored more than twice as many total runs as the Pittsburgh Pirates, 55 to 27. Yet the Yankees lost the series, four games to three. Even Natapoff, who grew up in the shadow of Yankee Stadium, conceded that Pittsburgh deserved to win. "Nobody walked away saying it was unfair," he says.




Via Geek With A .45

Welcome to Minneapolis

From the City of Minneapolis - Police Highlights, January 15-21,2008

24TH & LYNDALE TUESDAY 0315 HOURS 08-014486

49 year old male w/28 CAPRS, stabbed in the arm by a 40-50 year old female after he told her he didn’t have any smokes.
Lovely. He got stabbed for being a non-smoker. It's apparently safer to smoke in some neighborhoods.
16XX WASHINGTON WEDNESDAY 0400 HOURS 08-015491

Intoxicated 32 year old male had ever changing story about how a group of males and a female took his phone, $100 and his van after driving around together for a while.
"Intoxicated 32 year old male had ever changing story" made me laugh.
40XX XERXES THURSDAY 2030 HOURS 08-017119

Two males kidnapped a 53 year old male, locked him in the trunk of a car and abandoned him in Robbinsdale. Suspects then fled in victim’s car which was located using the OnStar system in south Minneapolis. Trevonnie Mack, 19 year old male w/11 CAPRS arrested and officers recovered a BB gun on his path.
This victim is lucky they dumped the car instead of eliminating him as a witness.
4XX NEWTON THURSDAY 2127 HOURS 08-017044

Domino’s Pizza driver robbed, beat and struck w/a beer bottle by a group of 7 15-17 year old males who also took pizzas & pop.
Robbed while delivering pizzas? Beaten by a pack of vicious teenagers? Unarmed by corporate decree.

Upcoming Movie


American McGee's Alice is scheduled to be released this summer.

For those who don't know:
Set years after Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Found There, the game features an older, more cynical and macabre incarnation of Alice.

Shortly after her second adventure, Alice's parents are killed in a fire of which she is the only survivor. Becoming catatonic she is institutionalized in Rutledge Asylum. Years later, the White Rabbit summons Alice to aid a radically altered Wonderland, now under the despotic rule of the Queen of Hearts.

I loved the look and feel of the game when it came out. The story is decent. This has actual potential to be a great film, especially if you are the sort of person who enjoys Grimm's Grimmest.


It is being directed by Wes Craven. Alice will be played by Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Here's hoping it's more than just another uninspired gore flick.

Quality Time

"All right, kids! We're going to take Gramma down to Target to rob them blind! Everyone get in the Pinto!"

LODI, Calif. -- A grandmother, mother and grandchildren were all arrested earlier this week on suspicion of shoplifting at a Lodi Target store, police said.

How special.

Linky

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

As seen on CNN



I guess self-congratulatory mutual masturbation and turbo sluts are more important than the election.



Ok, I guess I can see that, since the one real conservative candidate gave up today.

Damndamndamndamn

http://www.fred08.com/NewsRoom/PressRelease.aspx?ID=315be2be-5290-4fdc-b64c-26bc20154324

Statement from Sen. Fred Thompson

McLean, VA - Senator Fred Thompson today issued the following statement about his campaign for President:

"Today I have withdrawn my candidacy for President of the United States. I hope that my country and my party have benefited from our having made this effort. Jeri and I will always be grateful for the encouragement and friendship of so many wonderful people."

Minneapolis Police Highlights

Officer responded to purse snatching; 13-yr-old victim at bus stop accosted by 2 suspects who grabbed her purse, fled on foot; nearby fast food restaurant employee who witnessed robbery pursued suspects, recovered purse; employee to be nominated for MPD Citizen’s Award of Valor

Political Question

Why is Giuliani still "in" with only 2 delegates, but Fred Thompson is hopelessly "out" with 8?

Monday, January 21, 2008

It's a girl!


We spent the morning at the clinic. Brat #3 doubles as baby girl #2.

Fuzzy static pictures to follow.

Update: Picture added.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Myspace security theater

http://postbulletin.com/newsmanager/templates/localnews_story.asp?a=323478&z=19

Myspace has reached a deal with 49 states to increase security in regards to children.

Let's examine the new security arrangements.

Among other measures, MySpace agreed to:

* Allow parents to submit children's e-mail addresses to MySpace to prevent anyone from misusing the addresses to set up profiles.

This will work, as long as the kid has never heard of Gmail, Hotmail, or Yahoo, all provider of anonymous email addresses.

* Make the default setting "private" for 16- and 17-year-old users.

Making it harder for parents to monitor their kids. The kids, on the other hand, will still be able to add any punk, perv, or thug to their "Friends" list that they please.

* Respond within 72 hours to complaints about inappropriate content and devote more staff and resources to classify photographs and discussion groups.

Making who safer, exactly? Remove proof after the damage is done?

* Strengthen software to find underage users.

Software to identify people who say "I lied about being 18. I'm really 12, wanna cyber?"?

* Create a high school section for users under 18 years old.

I'm sure every kid out there will use this, instead of lying about their age.

Security Theater: Security theater are security countermeasures that provide the feeling of security while doing little or nothing to actually improve security.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Mexico doesn't want its citizens, either.

TUCSON, Ariz. - A delegation of nine state legislators from Sonora traveled to Tucson to make the case against Arizona's new employer sanctions law,

Hmm....What case? Let's see:
The lawmakers say it will have a devastating affect on the Mexican state.

At a news conference Tuesday, they said Sonora cannot handle the demand for housing, jobs and schools it will face as illegal Mexican workers in Arizona return to their hometowns without jobs or money.

Wouldn't that be defined as "No Case"?
The law, which took effect Jan.1, punishes employers who knowingly hire individuals who don't have valid legal documents to work in the United States.

Businesses found violating the law face suspension or loss of a business license.

It's about time.
Diaz said the Arizona law will lead to the disintegration of the family, as one legal Mexican parent remains in Arizona and the other returns to Mexico.

Boo-freaking-hoo. That's the price you pay for being an illegal immigrant, or marrying one. It's the same price paid by other criminals and their spouses and they get sent off to prison. If you don't like it, don't marry an illegal.

Linky

The Militarization of Mayberry

When you dress like a soldier, carry the same equipment as a soldier, talk like a soldier, train like a soldier (and in many cases, alongside a soldier), and you're told that you're fighting a war, then sooner or later you'll feel like a soldier, and then you'll start acting like one.

The problem with that is that the mission of the soldier and that of the cop are fundamentally incompatible. The soldier is there to kill the enemy and break his stuff. The cop is there to impartially enforce the law with the least amount of force necessary for the job.


From Marko

Update from the comments:
[M]ore people need to speak out against such police tactics, or they will continue with the implied consent of the citizenry.

Headline of the Day

http://postbulletin.com/

Drivers beware: Roads in area are slippery

Well, yeah. It is, after all, Minnesota in January.

A Proper Disclaimer

Nature is unpredictable and unsafe. Mountains are dangerous. Many books have been written about these dangers, and there's no way we can list them all here. Read the books.


Read the rest

I Bring You the Ism!

Via Random Nuclear Strikes:

FYI

Taking less money from people(tax cuts) is not, under any realistic definition, considered theft. If an across-the-board tax cut benefits the rich more than the poor or middle class, it's because the rich pay more taxes to begin with. Getting upset about this is just another way of showing off your class envy.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Burglar Proof

Here is a good document on beginning steps to burglar-proofing your house.

Found via the Minnesota Criminals blog, which is also home to free Minnesota criminal record checks.

Weekend Project


I think this looks like good father/son time.

The Privilege Meme

From The Anti-Strib.

How privileged were you growing up?

Premise: bold each of the statements that applies.

Original source: The list is based on an exercise developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University. The exercise developers ask that if you participate in this blog game, you acknowledge their copyright.

Father went to college - Nope

Father finished college - See above.

Mother went to college - Nope

Mother finished college - See Above

Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor - No

Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers - I don't get it

Had more than 50 books in your childhood home - Oh yes

Had more than 500 books in your childhood home - Close to 500 books per person.

Were read children's books by a parent - Almost every day, until I started reading for myself.

Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18 - Trumpet lessons for a few years, through the school with no extra fees outside of the POS trumpet. That turned out well. Also did a few computer camps over the years. I'm a software engineer now, so that was probably worth it.

Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18 - nope

The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively

Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18 - I'm not even sure my parents had credit cards before I turned 18.

Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs - That woulda been nice.

Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs

Went to a private high school. The nearest one was an hour away.

Went to summer camp. Boy Scout camp and a Christian camp, every summer until I started working full time at 16.

Had a private tutor before you turned 18. Nope.

Family vacations involved staying at hotels. We went camping when we had vacation.

Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18. Most of my clothes weren't even second hand.

Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them. I bought my own cars. My parents did loan me the money for a couple.

There was original art in your house when you were a child. Do a child's finger paintings count?

Had a phone in your room before you turned 18. No

You and your family lived in a single family house. Built by my Dad.

Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home. They built it and still live in it.

You had your own room as a child. After part of the basement got finished.

Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course. This new-fangled crap wasn't necessary then.

Had your own TV in your room in High School. A Pamida display model I bought myself.

Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College. Not a chance.

Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16. Not until my honeymoon.

Went on a cruise with your family. Hey, this was my honeymoon.

Went on more than one cruise with your family. Nope.

Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up. The Science Museum a couple of times.

You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family. We had wood burning and fuel oil. I didn't understand then, but I'm pretty sure the wood was burned when the fuel oil ran lower than the checkbook.

This shows me being pretty underprivileged. I wasn't. I learned to make do with fewer toys. I had to use my imagination and play with my brothers. I was given a solid work ethic, sense of honor, and a love of learning. Those things serve me more than a trust fund ever could.

Thanks, Mom and Dad.

Support the Honest Reporter

Michael Yon is heading back to Iraq, again, at the end of the month.

For those who don't know, Yon is a completely independent reporter who spends most of his time embedded with the troops in Iraq. If you want to see coverage by someone who isn't focused on helping us lose, check out his dispatches.


He has no funding, except for the sales on his website, and donations from his readers.

He is pre-selling his new book, due out in April.

If you can, give him whatever support you can.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Memery

From Lawdog.

Presenting Rambaud, with their debut album, "Prophylactic Measure Against Stupidity".

Quote of the Day

"Don't give an attacker what he wants, give him a hammer in the face."

-Marko

Monday, January 14, 2008

New Glasses

I've had my current glasses for about 6 years. I've noticed lately that I can't read the TV from across the room without squinting, so I'm getting my eyes checked next week. It's time to get fitted for new glasses.

With that, this is going to save me a ton of money.

The Purpose of the Internet

This kicks over my giggle box every time I hear it.

Gore Flicks

Wendy discusses a topic near and dear to my heart.

Over the last few years, writers and directors have forgotten the difference between horror and gore. Too many have decided that, since horror movies can include gore, gore flicks are automatically considered horror movies.


ATTENTION HOLLYWOOD!

You can make me nauseous, that doesn't mean I'm scared. Fear and the urge to vomit, though sometimes connected, are different reactions.

Let's discuss the genre.

Horror
From Wikipedia: Horror films are films of the horror genre that are designed to elicit fright, fear, terror, or horror from viewers.

Horror:
Merriam-Webster's Medical Dictionary - Cite This Source - Share This

Main Entry: hor·ror
Pronunciation: 'hor-&r, 'här-
Function: noun
: painful and intense fear, dread, or dismay


Terror:
Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Law - Cite This Source - Share This

Main Entry: ter·ror
Function: noun
: an intense fear of physical injury or death ; also : the infliction of such fear

Now, these words have slightly different meanings when pertaining to horror films.

Also from Wikipedia:
The distinction between Horror and terror is a standard literary and psychological concept applied especially to Gothic literature and film (Radcliffe 1826; Varma 1966; Crawford 1986: 101-3; Bruhm 1994: 37; Wright 2007: 35-56). Horror is the feeling of revulsion that usually occurs after something frightening is seen, heard, or otherwise experienced. It is the feeling one gets after coming to an awful realization or experiencing a hideous revelation. By contrast, terror is usually described as the feeling of dread and anticipation that precedes the horrifying experience. In other words, horror is more related to being shocked or scared (being horrified), while terror is more related to being anxious or fearful (being terrified) (Varma 1966). Horror has also been defined as a combination of terror and revulsion.

Simply put, horror is fear brought on after an act, terror is the fear brought on by the anticipation of an act. This is important.

To break it down to its simplest level: Horror movies are scary.


Gore Flicks
From Wikipedia:
A splatter film or gore film is a type of horror film that deliberately focuses on graphic portrayals of gore and graphic violence. These films, through the use of special effects and excessive blood and guts, tend to display an overt interest in the vulnerability of the human body and the theatricality of its mutilation.

More importantly:
Where most horror films have a tendency to re-establish the social and moral order with good triumphing over evil, splatter films thrive on a lack of plot and order. Arnzen argues that "the spectacle of violence replaces any pretentions to narrative structure, because gore is the only part of the film that is reliably consistent."

Simply put: Gore films aren't scary, they are gory. They don't attempt to create a state of fear through any kind of literary device, they only attempt to create fear by the depiction of "physical destruction of the body". There is no terror. There is nothing engaging the audience. There is no "edge of the seat" anticipation that makes horror movies so memorable. There is no clutching the husband/boyfriend/protector that makes horror movies so much fun. There are no startles.

You can get the same level of horror(the fear and disgust after an act) from a medical documentary.

Fear
Fear is the central component to making a horror movie work. Our current world is wrapped in bubble wrap and safety warnings. A good horror movie is a chance to get away from the playground monitors and padded boxes of modern life, without actually risking life and limb. We want a chance to be scared. I like going into a movie, spending two hours on the edge of my seat with my wife clutching my arm, and leaving exhausted. It's fun.

I don't like going to a movie, hoping for the above, and getting nothing but spraying blood and guts, with no plot. If you can't generate the terror(anticipatory fear), you need a new writer. Horror movies need a plot, but it doesn't have to be deep. They need foreshadowing, scary music, and startles. If that can't be accomplished, Mr. Director, you are in the wrong field.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind gore, as long as it is essential to the movie. Nightmare on Elm Street wouldn't have been the same without the blood, but it was the startles and anticipatory fear that made the series work. Gore has become the crutch for directors and writers who aren't capable of creating real fear. I force myself through gore flicks, hoping for a solid, well-developed startle, or a few seconds of terror. I am repeatedly disappointed.

Kids and Horror Movies
I don't spend a lot of time shielding my children from anything. I have watched horror movies with my son, when he was six years old. We started very tame, and progressed to what he can handle. I made damn sure that he knew the difference between reality and imagination before we started.

That said, he is not allowed to watch a movie with excessive gore or nudity, though some of each is acceptable. Movies beyond his age-rating have to be Good vs. Evil, with the forces of Good triumphant. No exceptions. This has instilled in him a desire to be a hero. He wants to help, he wants to save. He wants to be a "good guy" when he grows up. That was my goal from the start. He sees the occasional zombie, and he sees the good guys destroy the zombie. He sees people scared for their lives, but fighting and winning against all odds, and he learns to never give up. He knows that there are things worth dying for, and honor and glory are not obsolete. He knows that bravery doesn't mean you're not scared, and heroism happens in the face of fear. He knows that fear can be overcome. That's not a bad thing, even if other parents disapprove of my son watching R rated movies at 8 years old.

Replacing horror movies with gore movies is slowly but surely removing that from his childhood, and my adulthood. I'm not happy about either case. Fortunately, there is almost a century of horror movies available, and other genres with the same "Hero" style of plot.

People wonder why I carry a gun.

Linky

Cooperation isn't enough. An armed response is much less likely to get you hurt.

The Police Department said Jan. 11 that a young man was robbed of his money and wallet at about 10:53 p.m., Jan. 4. The man told police he had been sledding at Valley Place Park on 32nd Avenue and Lousiana Avenue in Crystal, where a man approached him and demanded his belongings.

The man told police the robber showed a large, silver handgun, which police said could be a semi-automatic, large-calibre gun. After the robber took his belongings, the man told police, he pistol-whipped him, causing injuries.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

A Story About Magic

Linky. The "I" in the story is not me.

Some years ago, I (GLS) was snooping around in the cabinets that housed the MIT AI Lab's PDP-10, and noticed a little switch glued to the frame of one cabinet. It was obviously a homebrew job, added by one of the lab's hardware hackers (no one knows who).

You don't touch an unknown switch on a computer without knowing what it does, because you might crash the computer. The switch was labeled in a most unhelpful way. It had two positions, and scrawled in pencil on the metal switch body were the words ‘magic' and ‘more magic'. The switch was in the ‘more magic' position.

I called another hacker over to look at it. He had never seen the switch before either. Closer examination revealed that the switch had only one wire running to it! The other end of the wire did disappear into the maze of wires inside the computer, but it's a basic fact of electricity that a switch can't do anything unless there are two wires connected to it. This switch had a wire connected on one side and no wire on its other side.

It was clear that this switch was someone's idea of a silly joke. Convinced by our reasoning that the switch was inoperative, we flipped it. The computer instantly crashed.

Imagine our utter astonishment. We wrote it off as coincidence, but nevertheless restored the switch to the ‘more magic’ position before reviving the computer.

A year later, I told this story to yet another hacker, David Moon as I recall. He clearly doubted my sanity, or suspected me of a supernatural belief in the power of this switch, or perhaps thought I was fooling him with a bogus saga. To prove it to him, I showed him the very switch, still glued to the cabinet frame with only one wire connected to it, still in the ‘more magic’ position. We scrutinized the switch and its lone connection, and found that the other end of the wire, though connected to the computer wiring, was connected to a ground pin. That clearly made the switch doubly useless: not only was it electrically nonoperative, but it was connected to a place that couldn't affect anything anyway. So we flipped the switch.

The computer promptly crashed.

This time we ran for Richard Greenblatt, a long-time MIT hacker, who was close at hand. He had never noticed the switch before, either. He inspected it, concluded it was useless, got some diagonal cutters and diked it out. We then revived the computer and it has run fine ever since.

We still don't know how the switch crashed the machine. There is a theory that some circuit near the ground pin was marginal, and flipping the switch changed the electrical capacitance enough to upset the circuit as millionth-of-a-second pulses went through it. But we'll never know for sure; all we can really say is that the switch was magic.

I still have that switch in my basement. Maybe I'm silly, but I usually keep it set on ‘more magic’.

1994: Another explanation of this story has since been offered. Note that the switch body was metal. Suppose that the non-connected side of the switch was connected to the switch body (usually the body is connected to a separate earth lug, but there are exceptions). The body is connected to the computer case, which is, presumably, grounded. Now the circuit ground within the machine isn't necessarily at the same potential as the case ground, so flipping the switch connected the circuit ground to the case ground, causing a voltage drop/jump which reset the machine. This was probably discovered by someone who found out the hard way that there was a potential difference between the two, and who then wired in the switch as a joke.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Converting Youtube

Occasionally, I run into a youtube video that I don't want to lose. ConvertYouTube will convert the videos to downloadable movies or mp3s for no charge.

Gina Carano/Crush

American Gladiators has fueled a new Crush. Pardon the pun.




Gina Carano makes the entire show worth watching.














She's feminine.












She's tough.














I'm pretty sure she could kick my ass without much problem.










What's not to love?



















All I can say is:

Friday, January 11, 2008

Headline of the Day

PETA Asks That Accused Cannibal Not Eat Meat in Jail

I don't have words for this.

Animal rights group PETA has asked the jail housing a man accused of murdering his girlfriend and possibly eating her body parts not to feed him meat, the activist organization told FOXNews.com.

The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals faxed a letter Thursday to the Smith County Sheriff's Jail in Tyler, Texas, asking that 25-year-old Christopher Lee McCuin be placed on a strict vegetarian diet to prevent him from being "involved in any senseless killing" while he's behind bars, said PETA Vice President Bruce Friedrich.

"Only in a culture where people routinely kill and eat living, feeling beings — corpses — would anybody think to kill and either eat or pretend to eat a human corpse," Friedrich said in a phone interview.



xkcd

Thursday, January 10, 2008

**** URGENT **** Help Needed

Update: There is a convenient paypal button here.

The story

Paypal can be made to melody.byrne@gmail.com.

Please help them keep their kids in the US.

... I can’t begin to tell you how hard this is for me to write…

We’ve been blindsided, and we need help.

We need to raise $30,000 in the next two to four weeks, or our children could be taken away from us by a foreign court, hostile to Americans, and hostile to gun owners.

As you may know, we’ve been in the middle of a very long, and very nasty custody battle with only two possible outcomes: full custody for us, or full custody for my ex-husband. We have attempted to be reasonable and accommodating at all turns, but he is doing everything he can to obstruct and harass us.

So far we’ve won, and he has lost; every court case, every motion, every mediation. Every request he has made of the court has been denied. Every claim he has made has been disproved. Every action they have moved for has been denied or dismissed.

We have won, over and over again. We WILL win this case, as long as we can stay afloat.

We can’t stay afloat much longer.

We’ve racked up $38,000 in legal bills over the last two years, fighting for the kids; against my ex-husband, who despite his low chances of succeeding is still intent on using loopholes in the legal system to try and steal custody of the kids.

It’s not as if he really wants the kids either. If he was really concerned with the best interests of the kids, he would not have reneged on the original negotiations, or he would have settled with us.

Instead he’s accused me of violating an international treaty and kidnapping the kids. He’s already lost the case in the AZ District Court, where the judge essentially threw him out on his ass. He narrowly missed defaulting twice in fact, because he refused to respond to a US court; while in the mean time, he was filing Canadian motions, without serving us with notice of them. He then tried to use those motions as a basis for his claims in US court.

They threw him out on his ass. He had clearly acted in bad faith. In fact, he was caught lying on the stand, and forced to admit it, not just once, but twice.

At this point, he has no legal or factual basis to continue; but he has one other tactic. He can try and bankrupt us by filing useless motions.

That’s what he’s decided to do. After his last defeat, he appealed to the 9th Circuit.

Our reply to his 175 page appeal brief (which was simply a restatement of all the arguments that the other courts had previously rejected) cost us $10,000 ALONE, and we’re still paying it off.

Remember, that’s just the paperwork.

That’s not the problem though.

The appeal and reply breifs were filed in September. We were scheduled for standard track; and normally it takes the 9th Circuit 18 months to 2 years or so to review a case and schedule oral arguments.

Well, two weeks ago, they revised our case to fast track; and scheduled a supervised mediation session between both lawyers.

Yesterday the lawyers and mediator held a teleconference, and all attempts at mediation failed. My ex husband absolutely refused any negotiation, and insisted on moving ahead with oral arguments.

From the point mediation fails, the oral arguments are scheduled for 2-4 weeks from the date of mediation.

2-4 WEEKS, maybe less. As soon as the end of this month, and almost definitely before the end of February the oral arguments will be held.

In order to present our case to the 3 judge panel and take his place in the oral arguments, our lawyer has to fly to San Francisco and spend (most likely) 3 days in court. His flight, lodging, meals, and most importantly TIME are all our responsibility, as is the week or more of full-time work preparing his arguments and catching up on all precedent which may help or hinder us.

The estimate for all of this? $20,000.

We were expecting this kind of cost. We were keeping up with out bills, paying down about $2000 a month, plus our initial retainer and deposit.

Unfortunately my ex forced a flurry of paperwork and meetings in November and December, which put us behind about $10,000. We’ve paid out another $2000… but now there’s this $20,000 balloon.

We would have been alright, because we expected to have 2 years or so to save up and pay for it. As of right now though, we don’t have a shot in hell of paying for it, especially on top of the $8,000 we still owe.

If we don’t send our lawyer to San Francisco to plead our case, there’s a real possibility that he will win the appeal by default.

We’ve requested that the case be heard on the filed briefs alone (there’s really nothing to say in the oral arguments that isn’t in the briefs); but my ex is refusing anything but the most expensive possible course of action. He knows that he has no legal ground to stand on; his only hope is to bankrupt us and make us lose by default, or give up.

If he wins his appeal, the jurisdiction for this case will most likely be moved up to Canada, which is ultimately what my ex-husband wants.

You see, his central argument for being granted custody absolutely depends on receiving favorable treatment from a Canadian court.

Why?

Well, the ONLY reason he’s EVER given for why the kids are better off with him, is because we have an “unsafe” home environment.

The reason he claims our household is unsafe?

Well, because we have guns of course. He’s tried to convince that court that the mere presence of firearms in the house is a danger to the children.

No questions about safe storage. No questions about how we’ve educated the kids (who know what to do if they see a gun NOT in the possession of an adult). Just hysteria over the presence of firearms in our house.

In fact, he tried to claim he felt threatened by the fact that I personally own and carry a gun. He tried to equate gun ownership with child abuse, and drug use.

Obviously this approach has not worked here in Arizona, or federally. Both the county, and district court judges literally told their lawyer to stop making the argument, because it carried no water with them.

... But if the case is sent to Canada, even if we could afford to hire new lawyers and travel back and forth, we would still be screwed. Every bit of our involvement with firearms and 2nd Amendment rights would be hauled out in front of the judge; and they would most likely listen to his tripe about firearms in the home being the equivalent of child abuse.

Unfortunately between current attitudes in major Canadian cities concerning private ownership of firearms, decades of left-wingers appointing judges, and the blatant anti-Americanism of the Canadian courts, we’d most likely be screwed. IF we could even afford to fight.

Even the district court judge noted that he believed the Canadian court would be unfairly prejudiced against us based on this argument.

My ex-husband knows this. He knows that we can’t afford for this fight to go to Canada.

So, in order to prevent us from fighting he and his mother have been using the insurance money from her HOUSE BURNING DOWN WITH HER HUSBAND IN IT.

No, that’s no joke. His mother recieved a $250,000 insurance settlement when her house burned down with her husband in it. Rather than buy a new house, they’ve been using the money to draw us into ultimately fruitless, and malicious legal battles. They are intentionally bleeding us dry financially, so we can’t fight them in court.

Up ‘til now, this tactic hasn’t worked; but we’re out of money. Chris has gone through all of his savings and assets, and his family can’t help. Neither can mine.

As of today, we can’t come up with the additional $20,000 necessary; or the $8000 to cover the bills that have already accrued.

We have no family who can help, we can’t take out a mortgage because we don’t own the house, we have no collateral to secure a personal loan…

...we’re screwed.

Why spend all of this money to draw us into legal battles? Well it’s obviously not to give the kids a happy, secure life.

All of this money spent on stupid, pointless, and malicious legal wrangling should have been spent on the kids. They should have used the insurance money to buy a new house and prove that they have a stable home environment for the kids. We should have been able to use our money to buy the house we’re in, and do things like take the kids to Disneyland.

But the kids aren’t the point. It’s not about the kids at all to them.

It’s about me.

They want to punish me for leaving. For escaping an abusive situation and taking the kids with me. They want to destroy my new, happy life.

Over 3 years of being dragged into court have taught me that all they want is to WIN. If they wanted anything less than my total destruction, this all would have been over years ago.

Instead they’ve been waiting for Chris to get fed up with the situation and leave, or for us to run out of money. Obviously Chris hasn’t left and will never leave, but we have run out of money to fight this battle.

I hate broadcasting all of this personal information, but I don’t have a choice. These are my KIDS he may be stealing from us.

They’re everything to me.

I CAN NOT let my ex-husband take them, because he will most likely do everything in his power to make it so I can never see them again. He has said exactly that; vowing that if they ever return to Canada we will never see them again.

If we don’t come up with the money I can’t keep fighting for what’s right for the kids.

So please, please help us. We’ve run out of options, and we desperately need cash or ideas for raising money to keep us going, as we enter this last, and most expensive portion of the battle. Anything you can give, any IDEAS you can give, are greatly appreciated.

Thank you,

Mel

AP gets it right?

Homicide Bomb Rocks Pakistani High Court, Killing At Least 22, Injuring 70

Finally, the MSM starts using the appropriate and accurate "homicide bomber" instead of the martyr-ready "suicide bomber".

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Death is too good

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,321249,00.html
BAYOU LA BATRE, Ala. — A man angered after a dispute with his wife confessed to tossing his four young children off a bridge, authorities said Wednesday as they searched murky waters for the bodies.

Killing him once isn't enough. Let me at him for a few hours, first. I don't need anything more than an emery board and a box of toothpicks.

Headline of the Day, Take 2

'Meanest Mom on Planet' Sells Teen Son's Car After Finding Booze Under Seat

After finding alcohol in her son's car, she decided to sell the car and share her 19-year-old's misdeed with everyone — by placing an ad in the local newspaper.

The ad reads: "OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."

I'd consider this a lesson well-learned by the kid.
She says she set two rules when she bought the car at Thanksgiving: No booze, and always keep it locked.

Headline of the Day

What are you doing here? - man asks wife at brothel

WARSAW (Reuters) - A Polish man got the shock of his life when he visited a brothel and spotted his wife among the establishment's employees. Polish tabloid Super Express said the woman had been making some extra money on the side while telling her husband she worked at a store in a nearby town.

"I was dumfounded. I thought I was dreaming," the husband told the newspaper Wednesday.

The couple, married for 14 years, are now divorcing, the newspaper reported.


I can't make this stuff up.

5 Dangerous Things You Should Let Your Children Do



And he's coming out with a book called "50 Dangerous Things".

Breaking a chokehold, and a chokeholder

Lawdog's School of Survival presents Appropriate Countermeasures to the Front Chokehold.

Remember, boys and girls, a chokehold is lethal force.

From the comments:

Back in the early seventies, a young lady I knew at a kwoon I worked out at had someone try to force her into a car by grabbing her throat like that. Her solution was a lot simpler; both his hands were busy, and both hers were free, so she just reached up with her right hand and hooked out his eyeball. This had the effect of making him release the pressure on her throat. She followed through (we were always taught to follow through until the attacker hits the ground) by stepping in and repeatedly kneeing him in the groin until he went down, and then went and called the police. Not only did he lose an eye, but he had suffered so much damage from her knee that one of his testicles had to be removed at the hospital. Just another way of dealing with an attacker that should be considered.


and
I also told her (and my wife) about the eyes, about the good 'ol "Grab, Twist, Pull" on the testicle trick, how a finger snapped backwards and held onto acts like a joystick, and the neat thing where an ear comes off with about 7 pounds of pressure.

It's also important to just don't give up. Punch, kick, scratch, claw, bite, and kill the SOB. Never get in the car, never go with them, ever.


and
if both of her assailant's ahnds were busy trying to apply a chokehold, there'd be not a thing in the world he could do to prevent her from drawing her Colt and going for slide lock...

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

I can't fake a headline like this

Moron Arrested After Driving Truck Into House

Bryan Scott Moron, 20, of Burleson, Texas, was arrested Friday after he lost control of his truck and struck a mailbox, then a house, MyFOXDFW.com reports.

Living up to his surname, Moron failed sobriety tests, the station said. The arrest report showed his blood alcohol level to be more than twice the legal limit.

Moron, a restaurant server, was also driving at an excessive speed, according to the report.

Money, wealth, value

Chris explains the difference between cost and value, rich and wealthy.

Monday, January 7, 2008

Geek Shopping

I found an aftermarket addition I need for my car.



Via Geek and Proud

Ron Paul





Via SondraK

Welcome to the Future

GM envisions driverless cars on horizon

DETROIT—Cars that drive themselves—even parking at their destination—could be ready for sale within a decade, General Motors Corp. executives say.


But will they fly? This is the future, and I want my flying car.

American Gladiators

I watched the premier of American Gladiators last night. This show is every bit as much fun as I remember it.




Laila Ali is an obnoxious host. She comes across like Tyra Banks on steroids. That may serve a certain demographic, but...ick. She'd make a better Gladiator than host.











I would pay to have Crush beat me. Holy Yum, Batman.

She has this cute little hip-wiggle/celebration dance that makes me think impure thoughts. She's a lot of fun to watch.










Unfortunately, this show is going to screw up my Monday night. Two and a Half Men is getting relegated to reruns, only, until AG ends its season.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Transformers: Animated

I watched the new Transformers cartoon on Cartoon Network this morning.

Important newsflash to CN animators: Transformers are robots! As such, they don't have lips, dimples, teeth, or smiles. They don't get wide-eyed when surprised. And they sure don't look like humans wearing armor! They are robots, make them look like robots! Megatron was the only robotic-looking robot in the show, and he was just a head.

Your assignment: Go watch the original series, or even any of its remakes and sequels and see how Transformers are supposed to look.

Hint for the future: Let the Transformers transform occasionally. That's where the magic is created for the children.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Things I've said this week:

"Don't let the dog taste your food before you eat it!"
"Quit kicking Daddy there."
"Go bug your brother."
"Mommy's got a baby in her tummy!"
"Give that to Daddy. Give it to Daddy. Give it to...Spit it out!"
"I'm tired, go take a nap."
"What do you mean, you don't want to change your sister's diaper?"
"Behave, or I'll staple your feet to the ceiling and tickle you til you wet your tummy!"
"That's a zombie."
"I wanna buy a pound of silver."
"Let it ring, I'm sure it's your mom calling."

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Fred Thompson

"What you see is what you get."

I like this guy and I fully intend to vote for him.

Quote of the Day

The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.
-Benjamin Franklin

You can't forget the important questions

#1. Sex with Robots
That's thought provoking enough but the really interesting questions are what this means to the concept of marriage fidelity as the technology is taken to the limit:

* If you have sex with such a robot is it "cheating"?
* Does it depend on whether you knew it was a robot or not?
* If it is considered cheating whether you knew it was a robot or not, then is it "cheating" when a person has sex with an "adult toy" of today?

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Chinese Counterterrorism

Maybe American troops have it too easy.

The world’s two largest armies, China and India, exchanged training in kung fu and yoga last week in their first joint counterterrorism exercise, codenamed "Hand in Hand 2007."


I would hate to be the FNG in this army.


Chinese soldiers from the People's Liberation Army presented a "Hard Qigong," a form of deep-breathing training.

It’s far more complicated than a Lamaze class. For the Chinese soldiers, it involves standing with bricks on their heads while other soldiers take a sledgehammer and smash the bricks.

Qigong also includes withstanding aggressive attacks by bricks and wooden sticks, being lifted aloft with sharpened spears and splintering wooden blocks with bare hands.


To help relax after the sledgehammers to the head....
For the Chinese, "explosive hot potato" was much easier than stretching. As part of the expertise-sharing, the Chinese soldiers demonstrated their prowess by igniting explosives and passing them from soldier to soldier, with the last one ditching the device before it detonated.

No Child Left Behind Getting Left Behind?

Minn. Senators Seek To End 'No Child Left Behind'
ST. PAUL (AP) ― When legislators meet next month, some Republicans will again have their eye on the No Child Left Behind law.

Republican senators plan to introduce a bill that would end Minnesota's participation in the federal program. The program is aimed at forcing schools to improve their students' test scores, and hands down penalties if they don't.

"What we want is to make a real firm stand for local control," said Sen. Geoff Michel, R-Edina, who added that he represents Senate Republicans on the issue. "We've had five years of the No Child Left Behind regime, and I think it's safe to call it a failure now. We're giving it an F and trying to take back our schools."


Because holding back the best and the brightest really isn't what the program had in mind, was it?

Privacy and Discretion

Shut up! Financial information is private. I don't care that you were stupid enough to rack up $35,000 in credit card debt to pay for strippers and video games. I don't want to hear you gloat about paying off your stupidity, either. Keep it to yourself, please.

The four-bedroom rambler marks the end and the beginning for the Hutchinson couple. It ended a marathon fight out of debt. It took them four years and eight months, but their $35,000 in credit-card debt is now gone.

New Laws in Minnesota

No more foreign-made American flags
Because allowing poor people to be patriotic is bad?

Carnival ride inspections required
I don't have much problem with this one. The carnies dropped the ball and people got hurt. The venue owners dropped the ball and didn't require inspections themselves.

Covering the medical gap
....new legislation could cover the medical gap for people without insurance in the 18 to 24 age group.

A new law requires some insurance companies to include coverage under family medical plans to unmarried children ages 19 to 24, even if they’re not full-time students.

“This is a group that when not covered under a parent’s policy tend to go without insurance coverage for reasons such as inability to afford the premiums on their own or a feeling that they are young and don’t need insurance,” said Randy Benson, director of patient accounts at Winona Health.

You're adults, but you don't have to act like it! I love it when legislator encourage a lack of responsibility.


Updated school bus seats

Making school bus seats safer for children in new buses, without requiring a retrofit? I can live with it.

Mercury-free products
Special labels required for products with ANY amount of mercury. Does this include my tap water, from the official city water supply?

Didn't think so.

Car buyers’ bill of rights established
Sometimes that new car comes with more than the eye can see. Rust proofing. Fabric sealant. Theft deterrent.

Add-ons get added on to the buyer’s monthly loan payments. Often, without the buyer noticing.

I guess we can't allow consumers to read the fine print for themselves. Literacy is over-rated anyway, right?

Darn this Global Warming thingy!

CONCORD, N.H. (AP) -- Snow fell across parts of New England for the third day in a row Wednesday, adding to last month's record accumulations and closing schools.

Flurries also extended into the Ohio Valley, and some children had an extra holiday as classes were canceled in parts of West Virginia and Ohio.

Temperatures fell to freezing levels as far south as the Florida Panhandle, and wind chill readings were below zero in parts of northern Kentucky.


Linky